Weekly Check-Ins: Reinforcing Our Bond

Juan Herrera
3 min readApr 19, 2023

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Our approach to keeping track of our emotional needs.

Summary

  1. Weekly Check-Ins are simply meetings in which my partner and I address relationship topics on a weekly basis.
  2. The meetings focus on reinforcing shared values, scheduling quality time, and discussing issues in a dedicated, prepared environment.
  3. These regular check-ins have helped us maintain a strong and healthy connection, proving that intentional time investment is key to our communication.

Intro

Staying connected and nurturing a relationship can be challenging, especially with the many demands of daily life. To keep our bond strong and address the ups and downs of our partnership, my partner and I have adopted Weekly Check-Ins. These regular meetings have become an essential part of our lives, ensuring that we invest time and effort into maintaining a healthy and fulfilling connection.

Why check-ins?

Before introducing our meetings, we experimented with different approaches to discussing relationship topics, but each came with its own set of limitations:

  1. Bedtime Conversations: While this was the most convenient time for both of us, exhaustion often clouded our judgement and hindered effective communication.
  2. Immediate Reactions: Addressing issues immediately after they arose often led to emotionally charged conversations, with thoughts and feelings not yet fully processed.
  3. Time Constraints: Occasionally, we would start a conversation only to be interrupted by external commitments, leaving issues unresolved and creating tension.

The main advantage of having a dedicated meeting, as opposed to addressing issues spontaneously, is that we approach these discussions with better mental and emotional preparedness. This ensures we have the time, privacy, and focus needed to truly address and resolve any concerns.

What do you do at the meeting?

During our check-in meetings, held every Sunday, we address five key points:

  1. Relationship Values: We begin by reminding ourselves of the core principles that define our relationship, ensuring we stay aligned with our shared goals and values.
  2. Week Dates: We review our plans for the week and schedule a date night, choosing something fun we’d like to do. In addition, we schedule a day when one of us will work from a cafe, allowing the other to have the house to themselves.
  3. Topics: The core part of our meeting is talking about Topics. Topics are simply issues we'd like to address. Anything that is bothering us about the other. This is the perfect opportunity to listen to the other and find mutually agreeable solutions.
  4. Previous Topics: We review commitments made during our last meeting to ensure we’ve upheld them and made progress in addressing any concerns.
  5. Send Screenshot: We take a screenshot of our commitments and send it to each other on WhatsApp as a handy reminder throughout the week.

Fun Facts

  1. We call our weekly check-in: "Juanna" (a blend of our names).
  2. We've been doing it for almost a year now.
  3. Our weekly meeting is inspired by Scrum.
  4. We use the Midnight Club’s toast as an opening for our meeting.
  5. We shake hands by the end of it.

Conclusion

Our weekly meeting has helped us tremendously in strengthening our relationship, constantly reminding us of the changing nature of our emotional and physical needs, and guiding us while we navigate its ever-changing waters.

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https://jdjuan.io

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